A house is made of bricks and mortar, a home is where memories are made. One of the biggest memories of our time in our current house, if not the biggest was my home birth. My second baby was born in our home, right there in our living room. He took his first breath as I lifted him from the water. The first thing he saw was my face in our front room. He decided to make his way earth side on that day in that place. How can I say goodbye to that place, knowing what happened there.
We bought this house in 2006, it was a new build so we are the only people who have every lived here. It was our first home together as a couple, we have grown together, got married, brought our first baby home here and Flixster was born here. This house holds many many memories for us. We are packing our physical belongings and taking our memories with us but the one thing I’m struggling to physically let go of is the place where the miracle of life and birth happened.
While we are waiting for the last things to be tied up in terms of the house move, I’m preparing to say goodbye to one spot in particular that will always hold a place in my heart, my second babies birth space.
In order to keep his very special place marked I have written all his details on a piece of paper with the words “was born in this home”, folded it up and hidden it between the floorboards and the ceiling below upstairs. I know that it’s there and will probably be there now for a very long time to come. It has helped me get ready for saying goodbye to the special place.
So it’s with a heavy heart I will be saying goodbye but as the door closes on that chapter of our memories I’m ready to open the door on a wonderful bright future and turn the page to reveal the next chapter in our memory book.
I can’t wait!
We’ve had some pretty busy weeks lately. With Grandma on Mondays, breastfeeding group Tuesdays and me back at work for my 3 full days Wednesday to Friday the weeks are passing by in a blur. I can’t seem to find time to get the house straight let alone write a blog post. I have however promised myself to find more time from now onwards. I don’t want to miss any special moments or firsts in your life.
Flixster I’m going to start with you as we’ve reached a very special milestone in your life. One year ago you came to join us to start your life here on earth. I remember it like it was yesterday and still love to relive your birth story. What an amazingly special time it was.
This was you just moments after you joined us as I sat back to admire your face and start our journey together.
This is you just last night in the bath, gosh how you’ve grown. We’ve had our ups and downs. Mostly up’s but I do wish you’d starting liking your sleep more! Mummy and daddy are pretty exhausted now!
You are defiantly a happy little man, always smiling (unless we’re trying to get you down for a nap, then its screaming!) but on the whole a contented little man. You’re in nursery 3 days a week now and I think you are getting more used to it. I try to take a peek through the window before I enter the room to pick you up and 9 times out of 10 you are ok. I know the ladies look after you there and they have told me you’re ace at giving hugs. I attribute that to all the carrying you’ve had.
I love how you’re face lights up with excitement when the boy enters the room, he is your absolute favourite person. In the mornings when he comes to join us in bed I sometimes think you’d explode with happiness the amount of screaming and dancing you do when you first see him.
On your birthday itself we didn’t really celebrate as we’d all been so poorly with a tummy bug, so we postponed the celebration to coincide with our wedding anniversary. Of course we let you have your presents’ on your birthday though as the boy was dying to play with them. For months he’s wanted to get you (really him too) some Toot toot toys, and form the moment he knew we’d bought them he kept asking if he could have a ‘little’ try!
Now that you’ve had your birthday presents off the family too you’ve got quite a collection, I’m not sure where we are going to keep it all!
Boy – we’ve just had a big milestone in your life too. We know now which school you’ll be attending in September. I’m so grateful that we were offered a place at our number 1 choice of school. I am extra grateful given that I know if lots of mummies who were disappointed with their allocated placements. It’s our nearest school too which is only a few minutes walk away. The thought of school for you fills me with both excitement and dread. I’m excited that another chapter of your life will start, but you’re just so young still. You will have just turned 4 when you start. I hope you cope ok with 5 days a week, the structured learning environment and the large mix of people.
I’m trying my best to prepare you for whats to come, I mention school a lot and talk about where you will be going in September. We have talked about uniforms and classrooms and having lunch there too. The other day I noticed that they publish the plans for the term ahead on the website so I’ll have a look and see if there’s anything we can do to prepare. I’m not asking you to be top of the class or super clever, I just want you to try your best in everything that you do. To be kind to everyone else and to listen carefully in class. I hope that for the first term at least we won’t have to let you go to after school club as that’s a bus ride away but I’m not sure yet how we are going to sort out school pick-ups. It’s just another hurdle that we will learn to cross.
You have been really loving with Flixster from the start but I can see now that he’s more mobile he just wants to do everything you’re doing. I know this is annoying you at times but I’m trying to teach you to share with him. I know he must irritate you when you’re trying to do something but honestly he just loves you so much that he follows you everywhere. He’ll soon be talking like you and I hope that you will be best friends together. OF course I know it won’t be plain sailing all the time but as long as you’re there for each other when it matters that’s all I ask.
I hope that despite our busy lives we can continue to have adventures together and make some fabulous memories this summer, it’s already shaping up to be a good year. Being a family of 4 is fantastic and I look forward to our up coming adventures.
Please always remember I love you unconditionally ……..forever.
Love Mummy x
Another month has rolled around, how did it happen so quickly? We are already in mid March! We have passed another milestone though, Flixster is crawling! This is wonderful and scary all at the same time.
Wonderful because he’s not getting so frustrated at trying to get things that he can see but scary because theses so many small things around that the boy plays with like Lego that I need to be extra vigilant about. It’s easy to baby proof the house first time around but this time its hard to keep an eye on the boy and what he’s leaving around too.
Flixster is chasing the boy around everywhere (at his low-speed for now!) which is driving the boy a little mad as everything he has Flixster wants.
Most of the time I have to do the shiny object distraction technique to try to give Flixster some other focus rather than wanting what the boy currently has. The boy is being very patient with him but I have to remind him now and then about snatching!
I do love the love between them though although I wonder for how much longer I will keep having to repeat “Gently”. I seem to be a broken record with that as the boy’s hugs usually resemble a wrestlers neck hold!
I love bath time together and Flixster adores his big brother, I think this is my favourite siblings photo for the month. They aren’t hugging or looking directly at the camera, but it just shows them getting along and at the start of what I hope is a lifelong friendship together.
I’ve mentioned this before but we’d love to move home. We are already very lucky to live in a nice home, but it’s a home we bought when there was just the two of us and now there’s four! We never imagined when we bought our first house together that we’d have our children here. We both thought that this house would be a starter home and that we’d be moving on before children but with the economy the way it has been the chance to move has never presented itself.
However fast forward 9 years and we would love to move soon.
Our current house was a new build property and we have looked after it. We’ve recently been looking around at other new builds and today I think we may have seen the perfect place. Currently the sales office isn’t even open at the houses so we are watching and waiting, hoping to get in early when it does. I just hope that we’ll have enough deposit for a new place, but if we don’t then we’ll look for something else and accept that it wasn’t meant to be on this occasion and where ever we end up will be the path the universe wanted us to take.
If and when we do move I’ll be sad to say goodbye to the house that has given us so much. We got married here (well not married but we left one day as two people and returned the next day as a married couple). I laboured for most of my first birth at home as I wanted a home birth but it wasn’t meant to be. Flixster was born in our living room and that means that the house will always be special, this address is on his birth certificate as his place of birth. He will carry that with him for the rest of his life.
We’ve had many happy memories here, too many to mention but they are just that, memories. Memories to look back on and smile. As we look to the future though, I’m thinking and dreaming of all the memories we are yet to make as a family, and no matter where we live as long as we have each other we’ll be happy.