breastfeeding Archives - Page 2 of 2

15Nov 2014

Breastfeeding In Public

by Lyric ⋅ 2 Comments

Breastfeeding out and about – aka IN PUBLIC! Shock horror! (Insert shocked hands up to face emoticon!) Why on earth would any women ever feel the need to get her breasts out in public unless she was trying to flaunt around a sports car and look sexy, or pose provocatively on page 3 of a certain newspaper – now that of course is perfectly ok.However sitting down, creating no fuss and attaching a hungry little helpless baby is an absolute no no. Ladies what do you think you’re doing!? Just stop it, stop it now! Nobody wants to see it, go and hide somewhere and feel ashamed that you are giving your baby milk tailor-made for their every need.

Now calm down and take a breath.

Feeding your baby in public for the first or thirty-fifth time can be scary, very very scary. But it needn’t be. In this post I want to share my experience of feeding in public and any hints or tips I can give you to make things a little easier and less scary.

First of all please know that the law is with you on this one. It is against the law to treat any women unfavourably because she is breastfeeding. In short you can feed anywhere you need to without being asked to stop, move , leave, or being made to feel uncomfortable. There is a really good information sheet produced by maternity action which can be found here. So armed with the right knowledge and backing of the law you may feel more confident about feeding your baby when you need to if you’re out.

But having the knowledge isn’t the same as actually feeding when out and about. When I was a new mum I was petrified of breastfeeding in public, I wasn’t so much worried about what people would say but what they might see. I didn’t want my breasts to be on show to the world. I hadn’t however back then worked out how I could feed discreetly. In my head I had imagined I’d have to sit in the middle of a coffee shop and literally ‘flap out a boob’ leaving myself half-naked, which simply isn’t true. Once you’ve overcome the first few hurdles of breastfeeding and mastered the position and attachment then you can start practising feeding discreetly. Just like learning to ski you can’t learn it all in one session so make sure you’ve got the basics down pat before you try the slightly more complicated moves!

There are lots of breastfeeding covers out there that you can buy to use if you would like to, or a simple muslin would be fine. I used one for quite a while with the boy and it gave me the confidence to know that wherever I went I would be able to feed him. He was quite a fussy feeder and so I was constantly worried that he may be on and off all the time. If you feel you want to use a cover to boost your confidence then go for it! Just make sure that you are not compromising your position and attachment when you do use it as that may make you sore. I haven’t used one at all with Flixster when feeding as I don’t feel that I need to.

Clothing – plan ahead! There are lots of breastfeeding specific clothes out there to buy, and that’s great if you want to invest in a new wardrobe but there are also lots of ordinary everyday items of clothing that will work well when breastfeeding. Spaghetti strap vests become your friend! I tend to layer up and wear a couple of vest tops, one you can pull up and one you can pull down to just below the bra. Then you can drop the cup on your bra and just expose the nipple part of your breast, once the baby is attached you’ll be showing barely anything at all. Wrap dresses or wrap top or pretty much anything with a deep ‘V’ shape neck can be teamed with a vest top – pull the vest top up, drop the bra cup and way you go. A boob tube and a t-shirt over the top, pull the shirt up, pull the boob tube down a little, drop your cup and away you go. Boob tubes are great under pretty much any top as they cover your middle which most new mums certainly don’t want to show and can be pulled down to just under the bra and your other top can be pulled up.

Where to feed – My favourite place is of course the coffee shops of wherever we are, because most of them sell cake! A feed for baby and a treat for me – after all they do say that feeding burns 500 cals a day (why I’m not stick thin I don’t know!) What if you can’t find a coffee shop though or you don’t want to spend money? How about a changing room, are you in a shop that has quite a few changing cubicles. Most shops have seats in them now, or at least somewhere to perch. If you ask nicely enough I’ve never been turned away. Now I realise it’s not ‘in public’ but it will have a seat which most breastfeeders need, and is easily available in most clothes shops! Failing that most book shops have seats too! Often larger shopping centers will have a feeding room so it’s always worth an ask.

When you first start feeding out and about and feel nervous about it have someone with you who can sit with you and chat, it might take your mind off it a bit and also make sure they too are aware of the law so that if anybody does say anything they are with you to defend you. At this point let me reassure you that incidents of anybody saying something to a breastfeeding mum happen far less than you think they do. I myself have fed out and about many many times and have never been made to feel uncomfortable, it does happen but of course those are often the stories that make the news. The millions of mums who feed out and about without incident every single day aren’t news worthy.

So please go out and feed in public if your baby is hungry, don’t let breastfeeding stop you from going out. If you need to start slowly to build up your confidence do that, everyone starts somewhere and those mums that make it look easy undoubtedly were nervous the first time they fed in public. Most of the time you wouldn’t give me a second glance when feeding in public, you’d probably just think I was giving my baby a close hug, but let me tell you it certainly wasn’t like that for me at first. I’ve been there. I’ve been that mum that would panic at the first twitch of baby being unhappy and needing feeding. You can do it, you really can, it just takes practise and the confidence will come.

Please feel free to get in touch with me if you want any further help or pointers, I’m happy to discuss my journey with anyone.

04Nov 2014

Breastfeeding – My Journey – The highs and lows for us

by Lyric ⋅ 22 Comments

Breastfeeding – Our Journey

I thought long and hard the title to give this post. I considered just calling it infant feeding but since I’m mainly going to be writing about breastfeeding I decided to call it that.

Breastfeeding seems to be such a controversial subject that divides mum’s today. Why is that though? Surely us mum’s should be sticking together, it’s hard enough being a new mum especially first time round without having to get into debates about feeding choices. Everything in parenting is a personal choice, a choice you make for your own child and no one else should concern themselves with your choice. Unfortunately sometimes those choices are taken away from us and that can cause emotions to run high at a time when hormones are already raging.
By talking about my journey I’m not trying to make anyone feel bad, far from it. I just want to write down my experience so that other mums thinking about breastfeeding may take inspiration from my journey.
When I was pregnant with the boy I was given leaflets about all sorts of things, being pregnant is paper overload, leaflets about every subject as well as advertising for products that you may or may not need. I dutifully looked through all the leaflets and didn’t think too much about breastfeeding at the time. I thought that once the time came I’d give it a go and if things didn’t work out then I wouldn’t be bothered there are other options. I didn’t think about the incredible bond I’d have with my baby, the rush of love I felt every time he latched on. The amazing feeling I got from knowing he got everything he needed from me to grow big and strong. It wasn’t an easy journey. I didn’t in a million years think I’d be sat feeding for the first few days solid. I didn’t expect to be up all night then hallucinating from the sheer wall of tiredness that hit me. I didn’t expect the pain upon latching on from the initial let down. Looking back I have no idea why I carried on in those early days. I think I was just determined to see it through to at least a week. A week came and went and I was still going. He was feeding every hour and I was so worried about going out anywhere in case he needed feeding. What would I do? It wasn’t that I was worried what others would say, I just didn’t want my breasts out on show for all to see. I hadn’t learnt in those early days how to feed discreetly so that I barely had anything on show. He was also feeding for long periods of time. Slowly but slowly, day by day we carried on and with help from the local feeding team and encouragement we had turned a few days feeding into a week, then a week into a few weeks. Gradually things got easier, the latch on pain had gone, I hadn’t noticed but it wasn’t there anymore.

There were bumps in out road, a fair few nights after being up for long periods I’d say with tears in my eyes “Thats it tomorrow I’m going shopping for milk and we’re stopping” but I never did. Someone once said to me that things always look better in the morning, and they always did. We’d get up, have breakfast, I’d feed you and I’d say just one more day. It certainly wasn’t easy, I found nights the hardest. I’d feel like I was the only one up in the world, so lonely. Thank goodness for technology these days, I was able to catch up on soaps and reading whilst feeding which really helped pass the time. I don’t know where the first 6 months went but before I knew it, it was time to start complimentary feeding. I carried on breastfeeding as by now it was easy and convenient in the daytime. No thinking about bottles or sterilising or how long I’d be out of the house for. I started to love it. I loved that every time I latched you on you’d reach up and stroke my face. I loved the rush of love I felt whilst feeding you. It became addictive.
I went back to work when the boy was 12 months old and he was only feeding morning and night then, as I did such long hours at work I’d often miss a feed here and there and gradually he became lass interested. One morning when the boy was 18 months old I was feeding him on our bed and he just didn’t want to feed, he was far more interested in watching television. That was it then I knew our journey was over. I was sad but happy all at the same time. Sad we’d almost certainly never feed again but happy he’d made his own choice in stopping. I couldn’t wait to feed again while I was pregnant with Flixster and thankfully his journey has been a little easier. I was so lucky to be able to catch his first ever feed on camera. I don’t have any feeding pictures of the myself and the boy which looking back I do regret but I’m making up for it this time.

In between the boys I went on the breastfeeding helper course run by the BfN, I loved it. I wanted to help other mums like myself to have an amazing journey, to know what to expect and what to be prepared for, but also how amazing feeding can be. I volunteer weekly at my local breastfeeding group. I’m not a helper to make mums feel bad about their feeding choice, I’m not bothered in the slightest by mums who chose not to breastfeed, I certainly would never put pressure on anyone to breastfeed. Like I said at the beginning it’s all about choice. But the message I want to bring by telling my story is that us mums should stick together what ever choice we make. Nothing about having a baby is easy lets all support each other.

Flixster’s first ever feed

If you want to read about the end of our journey then follow this link

03Nov 2014

Dear Boys…

by Lyric ⋅ Leave a Comment

Dear Boys,
Once again life is flying by, I don’t know where the time is going. Days are turning into weeks and months far to quickly! We’ve had some great times over the last few weeks though.
Boy you are once again learning things at an amazing rate, your speech astounds me everyday although I have to be so careful what I say around you now, you seem to have hearing like a bat. Especially when it comes to mention of food or drink. I love that you enjoy babychinnos anytime we are out having coffee. You can easily spot a coffee shop a mile away, which is good for us! You are currently sat playing the CBeebies games on daddies computer as I type this.

You are particularly enjoying the game where you have to join three or more like objects in a row. It was only a few weeks ago that you couldn’t do it by yourself and now you are powering through the levels all by yourself. I love watching how pleased you are with yourself each time you complete a level.

We went to Alton Towers again last weekend and you loved spending the day in Cbeebies land. You are the perfect age to enjoy all the rides and attractions. Thankfully for us it was a lot quieter than other times we have visited so you were able to go on all the rides with minimal queue times. I love watching you confidently deciding what you’d like to ride.

I think your favourite ride this time was Postman Pat, you dragged daddy and I on it a fair few times!

I stupidly forgot to bring you a jumper or coat so ended up buying a Cbeebies hoodie for you to wear. I hope that it’s big enough for you to get some decent use out of it as there weren’t many sizes left in the designs you liked.

We didn’t take our own food on that occasion as we normally do and it was nice to see that the lunch options in Cbeebies were sandwiches and picnic style food rather than fast food. With the annual pass holder discount it didn’t work out to expensive either.

We also enjoyed a day out at Blackpool zoo recently which went down well with you. The last time we visited there you were only 30 months old so you don’t remember it. We’ve bought annual passes for the zoo so I look forward to going back a few times over the next year. The zoo was a great day out as it’s not too large which makes it little leg friendly!

I’m grateful for the particularly mild autumn this year as its meant lots of time to play outside still which you love. Your face lights up if we are able to go to one of the local play grounds to let of some steam and have a good run around. You’ve even ticked off another first…getting your face painted. I love that as there were no pictures for ideas you asked to be a rainbow.

Halloween has been great, I’ve never really taken part in it before as it’s not really been my thing but I entered into the spirit of it (excuse the pun!) for the first time this year by getting some decorations. Daddy took you out to do some trick or treating at the local decorated houses as well which you loved. I’m quite sad it’s over now but have packed away the decorations for next year! My face printing skills aren’t quite as professional as the man who painted your rainbow!

Flixster you too have been changing and growing so much. We hit the 6 month mark recently but as you’re still not able to sit unaided I’ve not thrown myself into any complimentary feeding yet. You’re still breastfeeding as much as ever so as long as that continues I won’t be pushing the food. You’ve had a few bits of finger food here and there which you seem to enjoy but I’m not going to make it a regular everyday thing until your able to sit fully unaided. We want to do baby-led weaning rather than mushing anything so there’s no rush. You get all you need from my milk in the mean time.

You finally rolled over completely all by yourself this past weekend so I know sitting will come soon. Unfortunately I think you are beginning to go through the “only mummy will do” phase, as you are even unhappy in grandmas arms. I know it will pass and as you spend most of your life attached to me in a sling then there’s no problem.

After the zoo visit we made our annual trip to see the Blackpool lights. Ever since your brother was born each year we go and have a walk along the static displays at the Bispham end of the lights. We always park up and have fish and chips first then we have a wander down the lights and back, it’s just our family thing now which I love doing. This year as we’d been to the zoo with grandma and grandad we invited them to come along too. It was your first time at the lights Flixster and you slept all the way through it only waking for a few minutes at the end, oh well maybe next year!

I’m so proud of how you are now interacting together. Flixster you are laughing at anything your big brother does, especially if it’s a little bit naughty which is encouraging him even more. I can’t help but laugh sometimes! I hope growing up you stay close as brothers and are always good friends to each other!

Please always remember I love you both unconditionally….forever.
Love Mummy xx

15Oct 2014

Harvester Breakfast Review

by Lyric ⋅ Leave a Comment

This week we are lucky enough to have Daddy off work for three days, two of the days the boy is going to be carrying on at nursery and on Friday we will all spend a family day together. Keeping the boy in nursery means that Daddy gets to spend some quality time with Flixster and we can go look at and buy some Christmas presents for the boy. This morning we decided to go and have breakfast out somewhere which is not something we often do. I love breakfast, I think it is my favourite meal of the day. As a breastfeeding mummy I get so hungry in the night and have a rumbly tumbly each morning. I’ve always loved breakfast especially cereal and we often have a vast array of cereals in the house. I could eat it morning noon and night (and have been known to!) So as we were discussing it last night I was googling places to go and Harvester popped up. We have 3 different harvester restaurants local to us so we picked the one that was on the way to the place we were going today. Daddy dropped the boy off at nursery and came back to pick us up. I was very happy to see this sign in the door taking proud of place, as we arrived.

I’m happy to feed anywhere but I hope that this sign makes other mummies who may feel uncomfortable feeding in public a little more comfortable. No matter if you’re bottle or breastfeeding, babies should be able to eat when they are hungry and mummies should be free to feed anyway they choose without being worried about anyone else.

We arrived not long after 9am and we were the first people in today. It had been open since 8am but it is midweek so I wouldn’t have expected it to be busy. Not long after we arrived other people started to arrive too. We were seated at a table of our choosing and offered a highchair which we politely declined as Flixster isn’t sitting up yet or eating any solids. Our waitress explained the new menu. I don’t know what they offered before but it is apparently now unlimited which is new with a choice of continental (£2.99) or continental and cooked items (£4.99). Unlimited drinks of tea, filter coffee and juice was an additional £2.25. After both choosing the cooked option and unlimited drinks we went off to see what was on offer. The usual salad bar had cold breakfast items which you help yourself to rather than salad as it does for lunch and dinner. The menu listed all these items too but I noticed somethings were on the menu but not out on the bar. There was however still lots of choice including fresh fruit, yoghurt and pancakes.

Over on the other side of the room there was a table set up with a large toaster where you could put a choice of bread, crumpets or muffins through. This was also where the drinks were on offer. There was two large jugs of filter coffee and a good selection of tea bags.

The toaster and coffee

The crumpets and muffins

Coffee and tea

Tea selection and decaf coffee

Juice and milk

Everything was lovely and clean and looked and felt fresh.

I started with a small bowl of muesli (I tried to start a little bit healthy!) from the cold bar and I took a couple of pancakes over to the toaster to warm them up and pour a little syrup on top. There were all sorts of toppings for toast including Nutella and Marmite. Whilst we enjoyed the cold items we ordered our hot breakfast items from the waitress, you can have whatever you want from the list which included lots of different potato and egg choices.

We both made our choices and finished up our cold items. The pancakes and syrup were lovely and hubby said the crumpets were nice too. The hot breakfast didn’t take long and was exactly what we had ordered. I’m not keen on meat so I ordered the cheese and leek sausage instead of the meat sausage. I did have the bacon and was hoping it wouldn’t be greasy. It was in fact just perfect, nicely cooked and not greasy at all.

The scrambled eggs were lovely and creamy and the mushrooms had a lovely flavour. I loved the veggie sausage although would only have one next time as I was truly stuffed! We rarely have breakfast out so really enjoyed treating ourselves. It was past 10 by the time we were ready to leave so we had been there well over an hour. The total came to £14.48 which I think was really good value for money considering what we had enjoyed and the time we had been there. I would definitely return again some time, I think the boy would love it too. I imagine weekends do get busier and having to wait a while to use the toaster (as you do in hotels) may not make it quite as fun but I guess I’ll have to go back sometime and see.

Overall we really enjoyed ourselves, the food was lovely and a really good choice to suit all tastes, the place was clean and the service was good. The price was just right and I would certainly be recommending the harvester breakfast to friends, I hope that we can go back again soon with the boy to see what he thinks!

29Sep 2014

Mummy Mondays…..an extra pair of hands!

by Lyric ⋅ Leave a Comment

Monday, as a day, is my least favourite of the week, everyone is back to work the lovely weekend with hubby/daddy is over and I’m facing a day with two little ones to look after by myself. I love my children with all my heart but with Flixster being 5 months and the boy just turning 3 it’s hard to keep them both happy all day long…alone! So over the last few months on Mondays I’ve either been visiting my mum or she has been to visit us. My mum and dad live near Lytham which is about a 50 minute drive from my house on a good day with no traffic. Where they live is lovely and only a few minutes from the seaside which is ideal for the boy, there are lots of lovely parks nearby too which have been fully explored by us all over the summer this year.

I’ve definitely become closer to my mum since having my babies, I was always close to her but much more so after realising how much she has dedicated her life to bringing up myself and my brother. I now realise how much hard work having young children really is! So seeing her regularly has really strengthened our bond as mother and daughter. I now call Mondays ‘Mummy Mondays’ not only do I get to spend time with my mummy but the boys get to spend quality time with their mummy too….me. Having an extra pair of hands with the boys is fantastic, I get to spend lovely one on one time with the boy whilst my mum gets to spend time with Flixster. When I’m on my own with the boys Flixster takes up a lot of my time as he’s so young still and needs a lot of attention. He’ll only nap on me in the sling so even when he’s asleep during the day I find it difficult to play properly with the boy and I certainly couldn’t spend time on the trampoline or run around with him.

Today it was our turn to travel up to my mums house. I try to time the journey to coincide with Flixster’s nap, if I can get it right he’ll have a little moan in the car then fall asleep for most of the journey. If I don’t get it right he’ll scream in the car which I can’t bare so I have to keep stopping to cuddle him. The boy doesn’t like it when he cries either, he covers his ears, so when I know we are going to be travelling for a while I let him have the iPad and headphones to play with in the back of the car, it saves him from getting upset at his brothers distress. This morning after another bad night sleep wise Flixster was getting ready for a nap around 8:45am, the signs were begining to show, the moaning had begun and I needed to leave quickly to get in the car before the screaming started! I left the house in a hurry forgetting coats for both the boy and I and also forgetting my glasses. Thankfully the weather turned out to be nice and warm, so we didn’t need coats in the park and I was able to wear my prescriptions sunglasses to drive in. We arrived at mum and dads by 10am and soon settled into some coffee, toast and playing with the toys (this is almost always the first thing we do, raid the cupboards, isn’t it what all children do when visiting parents?)

As the weather had turned out to be so nice we made plans to go to a local park called Lowther Gardens, one the boys and I hadn’t been to before. It is only 10 minutes up the road by car so we all travelled together in one car. At the gardens we parked up and I asked mum if she fancied wearing Flixster in the sling as he was due another nap, something she’s not done before. I wear Flixster all the time in a sling so he’s very used to being all wrapped up and close to people. I never thought I’d prefer baby wearing to pushchairs being a big pushchair fan (I have had many and currently have 3 on the go!) but I do prefer him being close and me having my hands free to deal with the boy. Mum couldn’t wait to get him snuggled up and he was asleep within minutes, giving me chance to play with the boy on the play area.

The boy adores being with his grandparents and particularly enjoys time with Grandad, true on both sides of the family. After time spent running around the playground, climbing, swinging and crawling we went for a walk around the gardens, I tried to take in their sheer beauty, even in late September the flowers are blooming and the gardens looks beautiful.

We decided to have lunch in the cafe within the park and as it was so sunny we sat outside enjoying the weather. The boy was desperate for ice-cream and had to be persuaded to eat his lunch before we treated him to one.The cafe had a wonderful old cash register, the kind where the number go round, it as fantastic and made a fab noise.

Before heading home we had another play in the playground and I fed Flixster sitting on the park bench, something I would never have done with confidence when the boy was small. Breastfeeding Flixster has been a totally different journey than the one I took with the boy.

We headed back to mums before heading home ourselves, thankfully Flixster slept most of the way home, I thought the boy would have fallen asleep as well but he was so engrossed in his Cbeebies game on the iPad that he stayed awake. I don’t know why Flixster doesn’t like the car, but if he’s awake in there he’s usually screaming, if anyone has an ideas how I could stop this I’d be very grateful!

Lyric x

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