If you’re pregnant you may have been asked by the midwife or friends if you’ve done your birth plan. If you haven’t got a clue what that is or what to write then you’ve come to the right place.
A birth plan is written down plan of your wishes when it comes to giving birth to your baby. It’s a guide for anyone looking after you during labour. Of course every birth is different and birth plans can’t always be followed to the letter due to circumstances. It is however a good starting point.
Some women don’t want to write a birth plan and just go with the flow and that’s ok too.
It is though good advice to think about what you might like to happen at each stage if things go as you hope. I’ve had birth plans for all three boys. I’m also lucky to have been able to access the services of One to One midwives with two of the boys.
Thankfully my wishes were followed for those two births as my midwifes were familiar with my wishes and birth plan before the boys were born. At my most recent birth there was also a student midwife present who read my birth plan upon arrival.
If you want to watch my birth it’s on youtube and I’ll leave the link at the bottom of the post.
I thought it might help other parents to be if I published my birth plan. Please do remember that this plan is individual to me and my circumstances so feel free to pick and mix bits that you want. This plan is for a home birth and I have blanked out an personal information.
My Birth Plan
I plan to have a home birth as discussed with my One2one midwife
My one2one midwife D****** (07***********) is aware of all my wishes with regards to the way I wish to be treated during labour.
I wish to have a gentle labour, I prefer not to be spoken to while having contractions and I know from previous experience that I don’t like other people to be talking around me. I’m happy to speak in between contractions.
I prefer not to be offered pain relief and will ask for it if I wish to utilise any.
I will not consent to vaginal examinations during labour routinely but may ask to be examined, please do not offer.
I wish to try for a water birth.
I wish to be the first person to touch and hold the baby, when he is born I will pick him up from the water or his place of birth.
If I need to transfer into hospital I wish to go to ****** hospital not ******* hospital
In the event of a transfer to hospital before birth:
I do not give consent for anyone to cut the umbilical cord other than myself or my husband N***** once the baby is born
I plan to have the placenta encapsulated so please do not discard it, please label and refrigerate the placenta as soon as possible after separation from the baby until my husband is able to take it home.
In the event of a caesarean section needing to be performed either under a local or a general anaesthetic I ask that the placenta and umbilical cord stay attached to the baby (Lotus birth) and that I be given the baby for immediate skin to skin contact. In the event that I am unable to give skin to skin, please give the baby to my husband N***** so that he can give immediate skin to skin contact with the baby.
In the event of a transfer to hospital after birth:
If I am to have a manual removal of the placenta please be aware that I plan to have the placenta encapsulated so please do not discard it, please label and refrigerate as soon as possible after removal until my husband is able to take it home.
If the baby needs to go to a special care unit then please do not give any artificial feeds, I will be breastfeeding the baby exclusively.
I or my husband will discuss all eventualities as they arise. Please share any concerns with us as soon as they arise. It will help us to know the answers to these questions:
1. What is wrong?
2. What do you suggest and why?
3. What would be the possible outcomes with and without this intervention?
4. How much time do we have to make a decision?
5. Are there any other courses of action open to us.
We will be guided by balanced, informative advice. We want a healthy baby and mother and will take all necessary steps to achieve this.
A house is made of bricks and mortar, a home is where memories are made. One of the biggest memories of our time in our current house, if not the biggest was my home birth. My second baby was born in our home, right there in our living room. He took his first breath as I lifted him from the water. The first thing he saw was my face in our front room. He decided to make his way earth side on that day in that place. How can I say goodbye to that place, knowing what happened there.
We bought this house in 2006, it was a new build so we are the only people who have every lived here. It was our first home together as a couple, we have grown together, got married, brought our first baby home here and Flixster was born here. This house holds many many memories for us. We are packing our physical belongings and taking our memories with us but the one thing I’m struggling to physically let go of is the place where the miracle of life and birth happened.
While we are waiting for the last things to be tied up in terms of the house move, I’m preparing to say goodbye to one spot in particular that will always hold a place in my heart, my second babies birth space.
In order to keep his very special place marked I have written all his details on a piece of paper with the words “was born in this home”, folded it up and hidden it between the floorboards and the ceiling below upstairs. I know that it’s there and will probably be there now for a very long time to come. It has helped me get ready for saying goodbye to the special place.
So it’s with a heavy heart I will be saying goodbye but as the door closes on that chapter of our memories I’m ready to open the door on a wonderful bright future and turn the page to reveal the next chapter in our memory book.
I’ve mentioned this before but we’d love to move home. We are already very lucky to live in a nice home, but it’s a home we bought when there was just the two of us and now there’s four! We never imagined when we bought our first house together that we’d have our children here. We both thought that this house would be a starter home and that we’d be moving on before children but with the economy the way it has been the chance to move has never presented itself.
However fast forward 9 years and we would love to move soon.
Our current house was a new build property and we have looked after it. We’ve recently been looking around at other new builds and today I think we may have seen the perfect place. Currently the sales office isn’t even open at the houses so we are watching and waiting, hoping to get in early when it does. I just hope that we’ll have enough deposit for a new place, but if we don’t then we’ll look for something else and accept that it wasn’t meant to be on this occasion and where ever we end up will be the path the universe wanted us to take.
If and when we do move I’ll be sad to say goodbye to the house that has given us so much. We got married here (well not married but we left one day as two people and returned the next day as a married couple). I laboured for most of my first birth at home as I wanted a home birth but it wasn’t meant to be. Flixster was born in our living room and that means that the house will always be special, this address is on his birth certificate as his place of birth. He will carry that with him for the rest of his life.
We’ve had many happy memories here, too many to mention but they are just that, memories. Memories to look back on and smile. As we look to the future though, I’m thinking and dreaming of all the memories we are yet to make as a family, and no matter where we live as long as we have each other we’ll be happy.
My second son was born en caul at home in water at 8:38am on Sunday 13th April, this is the story of his amazing home birth.
I had planned a home birth for my first son but unfortunately things had not gone to plan and I ended up with a blue light transfer at 10cm and pushing due to meconium in his waters. It was the most horrendous ride of my life and subsequently I ended up with a horrible memory of a bad birth experience. I also had a retained placenta, which I always wonder if it was a result of having gone from the peaceful environment of home to the adrenaline fuelled ride to hospital where I was threatened with all sorts of intervention and eventually they tried ventouse. I look back and wonder if my body went into shock and decided to hold onto the placenta, so after a trip to theatre post baby arriving I was separated from my husband and left on a ward in the middle of the night to fend for myself, which is where I stayed for 2 nights.
Home Birth the Difference
This time I knew things had to be different, despite thinking I was prepared last time I hadn’t factored in not knowing the two midwives who attended my birth and them not knowing me. We were very lucky and blessed that when we decided to try for baby number 2 we conceived the first month of trying. It came as a shock to us both but I knew before the tests were even dry that I wanted to make contact with One to One midwives. I had read so many positive things about the service and had attended an open day information session they had held. I am extremely lucky that I live in an area that is covered by the One to One service. I referred myself to them and within a few days I had been contacted by our allocated midwife who phoned me to arrange a booking in appointment.
All my appointments were held at home where I never felt rushed and had time to discuss all my concerns and worries. At my first appointment I chatted with my midwife about my previous birth and how much I was still angry thinking about it and the way I had been treated. She was amazing and took the time to listen and reassure me that things could be different. Over the course of the pregnancy I saw the same midwife at each appointment and was able to form a bond with her so that she knew all my wishes and hopes for the birth.
As the weeks flew by and we drew closer to my guess date, I talked through with my midwife all the options I’d have if things during the birth didn’t go the way I hoped, I really wanted a home birth. I had questions about what would happen if there was meconium in the waters again and if I had a retained placenta. We chatted through all the scenarios so that I knew exactly what would be available to me should that happen. I trusted that my midwife had given me all the pros and cons of each option and if the time came where I had to make a quick decision I knew I would be making an informed choice for myself and baby.
With my first pregnancy I had not known which day or cycle I had conceived so had to trust that the scan date was accurate, I happened to go into labour naturally 8 days after the EDD with my first son. This time around I knew exactly the day I ovulated so was able to work out my own guess date. I was so sure I would go over that date again this time around that I made plans for roughly a week following it to keep myself busy while I waited for baby to decide when to be born.
The day before my ‘guess date’ I woke at 4:30am in the morning with what I thought were trapped wind pains, so I went to the toilet to see if I could make myself more comfortable. I returned to bed only to become uncomfortable again just a few minutes later, so I got out of bed to stand up again. This happened a few more times before my husband woke up to see if I was ok. Up to that point I hadn’t even thought that it could be labour, I began to realise though that the pains were coming and going and the only way I could get comfy with them was by standing up and rocking my hips. I think my husband realised before I did that, in fact this could be labour. We began timing the pains and they were roughly every 3 minutes at this point. Not wanting to bother anyone too early I waited until about 5:30 to ring my midwife. As I dialed the number my call was redirected to another midwife who I’d previously met at one of my scans. My midwife had told me that the other midwife would probably be my second midwife at the birth so I felt happy that we had already met her. She explained to me that my midwife had been off call for the night but was back on later in the morning. She listened in while I had a contraction and as I wasn’t able to chat during it she told us to start filling up the pool and that she was on her way. My husband immediately rang my mum to come and pick up the boy as she was going to look after him whilst I was birthing because we were nervous that I’d end up in hospital and if that was the case then we wanted to be fully prepared to leave at a minutes notice.
We moved downstairs and the second midwife arrived about 20 minutes later and we had already started to fill the pool. She looked at my notes and chatted with me, she told me that she had rung my named home birth midwife too and she was on her way. She asked if I’d like to be examined but I declined as I had already discussed with my own midwife not wanting any internal examinations unless I asked for them. At around 6:30am my mum arrived to collect the boy shortly followed by my usual midwife. By now I had put on the tens machine to try to help with the pains and was rocking through each contractions on all fours propped up on the birth ball. The atmosphere was peaceful, I had my labour playlist on random playing in the room and I got through each contraction by zoning out and rocking on the ball. I could hear myself gently moan through each contraction as it helped me to remember to breathe slowly and steadily. I remember my midwife asking me if I wanted to get into the pool but I’m not sure what time it was by then. I took the tens machine off and got into the pool, which by now was ready. The warmth of the water was blissful, I was able to move around freely through each contraction getting into a position that suited me each time. My midwife commented that my purple line was by now quite long and she joked that she thought the baby would be here in time for her to get a McDonalds breakfast. I wasn’t convinced! I had been in labour for 24 hours with my first son, so naturally assumed that although this time may be shorter, as it had only been a couple of hours so far, I thought I was in for the long haul still. I felt down myself at that point to see if I could feel anything, but there was absolutely nothing there.
20 Minutes before he was born
Not long after that I felt that the baby had moved down considerably and my midwife also commented that she thought she saw him drop down a lot lower. Sure enough just a couple of contractions later I knew I had started to push, I couldn’t help myself, my body wanted to do it so I just went with it. It was at that point I recognised the signs, I felt suddenly quite sick, like I needed to open my throat up, I could also hear myself change vocally from a gentle moan to what I can only describe as a “mooing” noise! At that point although I had my eyes shut and my head down on the side of the pool I knew the midwives had moved from sitting on the sofa where they had been for most of the birth so far, to much nearer the pool. One of them said that he’d be with us soon. By this point my waters still hadn’t gone, or at least I didn’t think they had. My midwife saying she could see his waters, so I felt down again and sure enough there was a bulging sack just on top of his head, which I could also feel.
I moved my hand back to the side of the pool so I could grip onto my husband and with one more push as ‘Fix You’ by Coldplay was playing he was born en caul (inside his intact amniotic sac) at 8:38am, at that point I reached down behind me as that’s where I thought he was but in fact he had swum up to the side and slightly in front of me. At that point even though it was only seconds it felt to me like minutes as I tried to locate him in the pool! I picked him up in total shock and turned around to sit down and cradle him, I remember just looking at my midwife and exclaiming ‘I did it!’ I couldn’t believe how quickly things had changed from contractions to him being here.
We waited for the cord to stop pulsing before it was clamped and my husband cut it, something he missed out on first time round. I sat in the pool with him on my chest, offering feeds and waiting to see if my placenta would come without any form of intervention. We discussed the birth and the midwife explained that he was born with his membranes intact and as he swam up he had popped them himself with his hand, I wish I had seen that! The second midwife mentioned that it is thought to be a sign of luck. After an hour it was suggested I stand up to see if the placenta was just sitting there waiting to come out, so I handed baby to husband who sat on the sofa and had some skin to skin time with him while I stood up.
Sure enough as I stood up the midwife gently touched the cord and out plopped the placenta. To me that was an amazing moment as I couldn’t believe I’d done everything myself without intervention or pain relief. It was the icing on the cake to see the placenta!
I was made comfortable on the sofa where I was examined and found that I would heal naturally given time. I took the baby back in my arms for skin to skin time and just sat staring for the following few hours, thinking about the amazing home birth experience that I had just had!
For the rest of the day I had skin to skin time with him under a blanket on the sofa until I finally got him dressed at 5pm. We couldn’t believe that out of all the songs on the playlist it had been ‘Fix you’ that was playing as he was born. That song has always been special to us as a couple and one of the only singles I had ever bought on CD and kept, I don’t own many CDs anymore now that everything is digital. We had even been there when Coldplay had filmed the video for the single, so although you can’t spot us on the video I know we are in the crowd! It was also poignant as this birth really has fixed me after such a traumatic time first time around. His home birth song is fix you and I love it just as much as I loved my home birth.
I truly loved every minute of the positive pregnancy and birth experience and would do it again in a heartbeat if I could!