When I thought about myself as a parent before I had children, I always thought about the sort of parent I’d be. Would I be strict? Would I be gentle, or would I get all shouty? I never thought about what sort of child I’d have.
The boy is now 4 years old and has been in school for half a term. Being his mum obviously I know him inside out. I know what motivates him and what pushes him away. I know what he loves and doesn’t love. I know he’s a very emotional child.
He has masses of empathy for other people. If he sees someone being told off or being treated unfairly he doesn’t like it. He doesn’t like loud noises, or shouting. He always knows when I’m sad, even if I’m just pretending, even when he’s busy doing something else. He gets very upset watching sad things on television, he fights back tears.
I have never told him to not be so sad, I always give him cuddles when he feels like that, and I have certainly never used the words ‘Man up’ because it’s not who he is. But I sometimes struggle to explain it to someone else.
How do you explain the complexities of an emotional child in a couple of sentences to someone you’ve never met?
Sometimes I just say he’s an emotional child, sometimes I try to explain he has a lot of empathy. Sometimes I say nothing and just let people come to their own conclusions. I just don’t want him to get hurt by anyone. It would break my heart if anyone ever told him to stop crying or man up, or if they told him it was silly to cry.
I want him to be who he is, true to himself, not having to hide his emotions. I want him to keep his empathy and to understand other people’s feelings.
I love him for exactly who he is and I don’t want him to be changed by others who think he should fit a different mould.