brothers

Dear Boys,

Sorry I haven’t written in a while and when I started writing to you I thought I’d have more to write about.  I guess life gets in the way. I’ll try and make more of an effort and make sure our little moments aren’t forgotten about with the passing of time.

So much has happened since I last wrote and so much is about to change.

To my beautiful first born big boy. This summer you turned 6 years old. Where has the time gone? It doesn’t seem two minutes since you were a new born and I was struggling with all those sleepless nights. The long lonely nights of feeds and comforting. Back in the early days it was hard but I had no experience of this before and it was all so new. How quickly 6 years has passed. You are now developing into a handsome, thoughtful, clever little boy who makes me proud everyday. You really like reading comics and playing computer games just like your daddy. You are most proud of you ‘Library’ and ‘office’ in your bedroom. For your birthday you asked for stationary, a microscope, a cricket set and some other littel things. You were happy with the carrot cake we bought at your request.

The stationary went down really well, you were so happy with all the bits and pieces that Grandma had bought for you, including the hole punch and paper clips.

You have now started year 2 in school and I think you’re getting on ok. It’s only been a week but so far so good. I know you dislike writing so will try and get away with minimum effort on that but it would be nice if you at least tried! Maths and reading are your absolute strong subjects. You are a little wizard with numbers, I hope you carry on learning and enjoying maths as much as you do now. All I ever ask is that you try your very best with everything.

To my beautiful baby boy (soon to be not such a baby) you are fast developing the cheekiest little personality. Your speech over the last few months has come on so quickly and I can now hold full conversations with you which I love doing. You are showing more of an interest in books too and love listening to a bedtime story (if you’re not distracted too much!) Your favourite thing is to be outside, you’re such an outdoor person. You love nothing better no matter what the weather than throwing on a pair of shoes and getting out. The first thing you tell me about nursery is if you’ve had chance to go out or not.

At nursery you’ve now moved up to the pre-school room and you are learning more and more each day. The lovely ladie have also noted how you’ve started to come out of your shell and speak a lot more. You are good at nursery which I’m pleased about as you’re not always an angel at home! I think you and your brother wind each other up quite a bit when you are together though so it’s not just you! After Christmas you’ll be starting at the new nursery which is attached to the school I hope you will attend. To prepare you we’ve visted and talked about it lots, so much so that you want to go now. I do hope you love it as much as your current nusery. Your current nursery i so much more homely and they’ve known you a long time. the new nursery is much more like a school but I guess I have to let you grow up sometime. You won’t be my baby forever. Although for now I treasure the times you get so tired on a Friday night when we watch family films that you fall asleep in my arms, like a baby. I love it.

 

We’ve started toilet training 5 days ago and so far so good. You seem to have mastered the wee’s and were doing ok with the poo’s until you got to nursery. Hopefully you’ll get it very soon and stop having the accidents. I think you just get so distraced when playing and forget! I’m proud of how you’ve done though so far.

All too soon boys our little world of just you two will change forever as you’re new brother arrives to join us. I’m worried that you’ll feel pushed out but I’ve tried to include you in everything. I hope you remember watching the bump grow as you grow older yourselves. At 6 and 3 you’re likely to not remember a whole lot about the pregnancy but I do want to involve you. This is the last little person we’ll be adding to the family and I guess he will take the place of ‘baby boy’. I hope we don’t upset the balance.

I’m planning another home birth and I sort of hope it coincides with you being able to be there when he’s born. I think it would be a fabulous thing for you to experience and I think you’d be ok with it all and take it in your stride. I thik it would help you understand that the baby just didn’t turn up out of the blue but arrived into this world surounded by love.

Just becasue we’re having another baby doesn’t mean I will love you any less, in fact I hope my love will just keep on growing like it always has with you both. My heart can accomodate one more little guy.

I can’t wait for you to all grow up together, I hope you all stay close. By close I mean close at heart, no matter where life takes you. No matter what journey you follow or how far you travel always know you have each otherNever forget I love you with all my heart forever and always.

Mummy xxx

Dear Boys,

I’ve not written to you in a while. I just didn’t want to just repeat the same thing over again. I wanted to make sure I had something to tell you.

Boy – You’ve said some adorable things recently. Its moments when I hear you say loving things to me, Flixster or Daddy that make my heart melt. Yesterday when I was brushing my hair you insisted on using the brush too saying you didn’t want to look like a ‘Squarecrow’. It was just beautiful. You are so loving with Flixster too, always trying to cheer him up if he’s sad, or play peek a boo to keep him entertained.

IMG_2363

Sometimes though I do wonder if you can’t exhale without speaking or making a noise, even when you’re eating you have to make a humming noise. I was chatting to you the other day and politely asking you to keep the noise down in the back of the car as I was trying to concentrate and you came back with ‘Sorry Mummy I can’t turn the volume down on my voice as I’ve got a big massive chicken inside me and he keeps making me loud!’ I laughed so much I nearly cried! I don’t know where you get these things from!

While we were on my bed changing Flixsters nappy the other day I was gentle playing with his feet. You came over took one sniff and exclaimed ‘Pooooooooooweeeeey, his feet smell of Halloween things and Halloween dresses’. That was a weird one, since we are now in March!

IMG_2258

We’re still waiting to find out which school you’ll be going to, we’ll find out in April. I dearly hope you’ll be ready for school being an August baby. It’s going to be a tough transition for you I think as you don’t deal well with change but I will prepare you as best I can for it. I can’t imagine you in a school uniform but the time will soon be upon us and you’ll be my baby no longer. I never thought I’d be a crying mum at the gates but the closer we get the more I’m getting emotional about it.

Flixster – Time is passing so quickly, a little too quickly. This week you’re turning 11 months, not far from your first birthday already. This last week you’ve tried so hard to learn to crawl and to some extend you’ve managed it now. It’s a mix of wiggling, pushing and rolling, but you’re getting where you want to be, and thats usually where I don’t want you to be! Yesterday on the way to Grandma’s I had to stop the car quickly after your brother exclaimed that he thought you were eating paper, then he shouted no mummy its LEGO! Indeed you were eating two pieces of lego, goodness knows if they’d been in your mouth since we left the house or if you’d concealed them in your hand then later popped them in your mouth. I really do have to keep an extra eye out for you now you’re on the move.

IMG_1614

You’ve started nursery but I don’t think you like it one bit, and all I can say is sorry. Sorry you have to go there, sorry we have to leave you. Sorry you don’t understand why we’re not there for you but one day I will explain to you why. I know the people there look after you and your brother is very happy there. It’s a lovely place and I know you’re safe but being such an attached baby I think you’re finding the transition hard. I can’t not work though, I have to go back to work to earn money to keep us in our home. I just hope you settle in soon. I’m sending in breastmilk for you to have so hopefully that’s bringing you comfort during the day. I love you so much and it’s hard to see you upset there, but we don’t have any other option right now.

IMG_1579

Together you are playing, although boy I’m not sure you’re too keen on how mobile and interested Flixster is in all your toys. I’m trying to explain to you that Flixster isn’t actually snatching on purpose, he just wants to see what your doing. His face still lights up when you enter the room, I think you’re going to be good friends.

IMG_1498

Please always remember I love you unconditionally ….forever.

Love Mummy x